Invitez-Moi à Votre Fête

Comments (7)

I'm at a place in my life where I feel incredibly insecure all the time. I grew up being "the smart girl" who excelled at school, but here I sit with several years between myself and a college degree and with a growing number of universities who don't even want to look at my transcripts. As a perfectionist, this is extremely difficult to swallow.

I try explaining to people that I really just didn't go to class at all, and they smile and nod politely. But I can tell from the sad little flicker in their eyes that they think I'm the world's biggest failure.

Hello, humility. I don't think we've met.

That said, I was extremely uncomfortable at my friend's wedding reception being surrounded by four of the smartest individuals I have ever met. The gentleman who was to my right speaks at least four languages, and his wife is fluent in several, as well. He's a college professor. They've lived in Italy. Their combined IQ would probably be around three million. Not possible, you say? Well, shut up. It's true.

Throughout the course of the evening, I did a lot of listening and a lot of learning. I have since forgotten the phrases I learned in German, French, Italian, and Spanish, but I did remember one key lesson:

If you want to really impress people, memorize the pledge of allegiance in another language.

The smart wife of the smart man to my right had committed to memory the French pledge of allegiance, but she let it slide from her tongue so elegantly that I thought she was simply making conversation. She then repeated it to me in an angrier tone, showing how she could recycle the same material with different inflections and still manage to impress people. (Only now does it occur to me that perhaps it was the American pledge of allegiance in French. Either way, it was amazing.)

Of course, anyone who is fluent in French probably wouldn't be fooled by the ruse, but it is certainly a great party trick to have on hand here in America. And by golly, that Hey, look how many rejection letters I have! trick just isn't working for me anymore, so I'm happy to replace it. What cool tricks do you have up your sleeves?

P.S. No, I do not want to know that my title actually means "there's a monkey in my pants." Ignorance is bliss.

Nick Tabick

Nick Tabick

There are other measures of success (also: failure) than simply what colleges you can or can't get into, or what classes you did or didn't attend. And really, all a degree means is that you can do coursework; there are plenty of instances where the degrees mean nothing save that you did coursework. Not to belittle anyone's view of a college education, but it's true: just because someone has a degree doesn't make necessarily them any more qualified than someone else. The same is true for transcripts - they say nothing about you or your character; the only thing a transcript is good for is proving that you can or can't handle the school environment you were put in.

Think about the rejection letters not as colleges "rejecting the truant" but as schools passing up the opportunity to have an individual such as yourself attend their classes.

(And I don't speak a word of French, but if Google is any indication, your title does not translate to anything having to do with our hairy animal relatives. ;) )

Rachelskirts

Rachelskirts

Nick Tabick: I know that what you're saying is true, but it's hard to break the habit of judging myself by my current GPA. Actually, it's just hard to break the habit of judging myself. I try to give the impression that I'm totally fine with the fact that I'll be in college until I'm 80 years old at this rate, but I can't help but feel like I'm falling short of my own goals for myself. And, well, that's just not any fun.

On the other hand, some amazing friendships came out of the four years since high school graduation, and I wouldn't trade a single one of them for the chance to correct my class-skipping ways. It's just hard to remember that when I'm 1,000 miles away from my friends.

(Good heavens, I'm a whiny little one these days. Sorry, internet!)

Blindsquirrel

Blindsquirrel

I'm a career underachiever, so I don't have a whole lot of credibility. However, I'd just like to point out that you're better off being intelligent than educated.

Regarding party tricks...

اهلا و سهلا بك

It's not quite the pledge, but hey, nobody's perfect.

nyag

nyag

I quit my job in engineering just so I can come home for the summer. Since you still have a job, feel good that you outlasted me in a career.

Joel

Joel

For party tricks I just come up with all kinds of snappy comebacks. And I can play guitar. Oh, and I can squeeze an orange peel and cause the citrus to make a little spurt of flame with a lighter.

MajalisBlooms

MajalisBlooms

They might have a rockin' IQ, but I bet if they had a blog it'd be boring as dirt.

susan m

susan m

my party trick is spilling food on my shirt. it never draws a crowd though, for some odd reason.