A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes

Comments (8)

A good friend recently confronted me about the way I talk to and about boys. He pointed out all the blog posts and Twitter updates about imaginary (and, on a very rare occasion, not-so-imaginary) make-out sessions, and how I tend to fantasize about any hot guy who crosses my path. I hadn't really found anything wrong with that before, but it slowly dawned on me what a terrible habit that is to be establishing. Obviously, if I ever nab a boyfriend or (gasp!) a husband, I can't be writing love letters to other cute boys on the internet anymore.

Now, I don't like giving away blog secrets like this, but I never actually wanted anything to happen with Panera Kyle or Cute Tuesday Boy or Hotsauce. It's just that, in my 23 years of being single, I've allowed myself to view plotting out my romantic future as a game. A pathetic, lonely game. Hi, I am destined to be a cat lady, so I might as well imagine having a wonderful life with each lovely guy I pass. After all, that's as close as I'll ever get!

Granted, my head is not full of negative thoughts like that (except perhaps after I've watched a romantic movie). However, it is the mindset I've been operating under for a long time — that it is acceptable to have a wonderful life in the fantasy world I've created in my head even if it's at the expense of my real life. Which, for the record, is also wonderful a lot of the time.

That isn't good at all, whether it's related to the subject of boys or any other part of my life I could imagine improving in some way. I'm grateful for the much-needed wake-up call, since I don't want to be one of those people who spends all my time dreaming and none of my time living. The challenge will be to see if I can carry these thoughts out in a meaningful way instead of just filling up more space on the internet.

What do you think? Have you been living out your dreams or simply dreaming your life away? How likely is it that Elijah Wood will want to help me live out my dreams? Is the Muffin Man immortal, or is it just a title that gets passed along from one man to the next (like the Dread Pirate Roberts)? Discuss.

TheQueen

TheQueen

Your friend is in love with you. Duh.

Angela

Angela

Hello. My name is Angela and I'm boycrazy.

No, really. I'm 21 and I'm just as bad as I was when I was 12. Seriously, whenever I go out, I'm just always looking around for cute guys. It's TERRIBLE. I'm glad my friends can still put up with it.

MysteryMan

MysteryMan

Ms. Skirts, your ideologies and rampant day dreaming are normal. Mortals, like your sexy little self, are constantly in need of stimulation. Would your thoughts be so bad if you thought about your perfect wedding every time you randomly see "Just Married" sign on a car? No. So I see no problem in dreaming about Mr. McSexy on random occasions as long as you know that, unless you approach him or he approaches you, they are just dreams.

And AH HA! You still don't know who I am. I am the MysteryMan!

But seriously, your day dreams will make some guy lucky one day as I'm sure dirty thoughts that make you smile a little pop up from time to time that you can add to your list of "one day I WILL do this" list.

My list is 900 pages, size 6 font, Comic Sans :)

PS: If you have a fantasy day dream about me please let me know. I would be honored. I am also curious to see how you would describe me.

Gilligan

Gilligan

Ok, that post above is more than a little creepy... :-p You better watch it, MysteryMan. She's got friends, you know.

Anywho, I think that your friend is right, and it's a good thing to realize that reinforcing these fantasies can possibly lead to difficulties in the future, because of course you only want to dream about one man in your life eventually.

However, I can't say that I haven't thought of how my life would be with this girl or that one that I've had a thing for from time to time. It's actually helped sometimes to let me think about what the reality might actually be if I were to go forward on that quest. So, a little daydreaming isn't too bad, but don't let it be your default action whenever the next cutie walks by. :-)

You're an awesome person and a beautiful child of God. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Carry on in the goodness of life in the now most of the time, and you'll be alright.

Cheerio!

Mr. Muffin

Mr. Muffin

You are absolutely right, my dear. The trick is not to confuse fantasy with reality. It's one thing to imagine possibilities (even possibilities not really desired!) but another to imagine that they're already real. It's more dangerous yet when communicating those pieces of imagination, as others may take them as real!

Take myself, for example. I receive dozens of letters every week at my home address, asking me whether I know the Muffin man, or whether I AM the Muffin man. I assure you, I am a normal person just like you or anyone else! But people get an image worked up in their mind and cannot let go of it. Even people who don't truly think of a Muffin Man pass the tradition along, and some people take it so seriously that they go on a hunt to discover this reality. I pity the life of a true celebrity; I get too much attention as it is! I would have even more bother if I lived in London, but thankfully I can escape some of the limelight at my little cottage.

You sound like a wonderful girl who's realising not only that the line between fantasy and reality needs to be drawn in bold but also that the colourful language of an active mind can confuse those who haven't drawn that line for themselves (or don't know where your line is)!

Do look me up if you're ever in England. Cheers, my dear!
Yours,
Mr. Muffin
Drury Ln, Mortimer, Reading, West Berkshire RG7, UK

phampants

phampants

Dreaming doesn't hurt. It helps you realize what you want from a person. That being said, when you do find someone, don't blog about how wonderful the fake boy is. It's an ego killer for your boy.

Jace Fuse

Jace Fuse

Hey, you are adored. Remember?

I think you hang onto your dream world because most of the time dream worlds kick ass compared to the real world. You want the real world to be just as good.

I see nothing wrong with that.

Team Christmas

Team Christmas

Dreams are fine. Dream worlds, not so much. As long as you live in a dream world, you will be constantly dissapointed with the real world. But, if you live in the real world, you are able to try and follow the dreams you have. Its a lot more scary, and tends to hurt more, but in the end, should be a lot more fulfilling. I think you should follow the dreams, instead of just dreaming. They may end badly, in which case you have your friends to rely on. Or, they may end wonderfully. But either way, you will have the satisfaction of following your dreams.