Candyland Meets Skirtsville

Hershey's Kissables, though tasty and delicious, don't really make you all that kissable. In fact, they leave an undesirable sugary coating on the outside of your teeth. After a few more bags of these, I won't be able to close my own mouth because of all the build-up. To me, at least, that is nearing the very antithesis of sexy.

Heart-shaped Jolly Rancher suckers, on the other hand, are super hot. They make your mouth taste all fruity and fantastic. I plan to sneakily offer one to Mr. Cute Boy this week. Once he sees that I have one, too, he will understand that we were meant to be. We will spend the rest of the week making out in a janitor's closet at church.