Don't let our brilliance intimidate you.

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Over the past few weeks, my office has been torn to shreds. The wall next to my desk was bumped out a full two feet, and the whole room was painted in a lovely golden color just today. My coworker walked in to my newly expanded space and exclaimed, "Wow! This new color really makes the room look bigger!" I exchanged baffled glances with my office roomie before all three of us burst into laughter.

"Yeah, that whole moving the wall thing kinda helped, too," I snickered.

"Must be the paint fumes, huh?" my roommate added jokingly.

Ten minutes later, I caught this same lovely roommate trying to move a part of her desktop wallpaper image while she was rearranging her other icons. Giggles erupted again. "Blame it on the paint fumes," I said as I walked out the door.

It wasn't even thirty seconds later when I found myself standing at the drinking fountain in the hallway, reading the "Out of order. Please do not use!" sign while stupidly continuing to try to fill my water bottle. I had to glance at the sign three different times before it connected in my brain that the lack of water coming from the fountain was related to the message I was reading.

All this to say, I am going to be very sad when all this construction is over because I'll have to come up with new excuses for my idiocy. "I'm going through paint fume withdrawal!" just isn't going to cut it, and I can only blame the drywall dust for another five minutes or so. Feel free to throw any ingenious suggestions my way. Heaven knows I need the help.