Hershey's Kissables, though tasty and delicious, don't really make you all that kissable. In fact, they leave an undesirable sugary coating on the outside of your teeth. After a few more bags of these, I won't be able to close my own mouth because of all the build-up. To me, at least, that is nearing the very antithesis of sexy.

Heart-shaped Jolly Rancher suckers, on the other hand, are super hot. They make your mouth taste all fruity and fantastic. I plan to sneakily offer one to Mr. Cute Boy this week. Once he sees that I have one, too, he will understand that we were meant to be. We will spend the rest of the week making out in a janitor's closet at church.