When Practice Doesn't Make Perfect
By day, I work at a church. I do a lot of girly projects, since part of my job is to assist the Director of Women's Ministries. My week is filled with butterfly graphics, swirly Photoshop brushes, feminine fonts, and the notion that all women enjoy cooking and tea parties and the color pink.
By night, I am a wannabe tough girl. I watch action movies and gritty television shows. I hold up my Nerf gun and wonder what it would be like to hold a real gun. I practice my grimace in the mirror, training my eyes to pierce through the very souls of my enemies.
But somehow, in the end, I am only effective in being a bitch when it comes to correcting the spelling and grammar of those who chat with me on AIM. I believe this is what the internet would call an "epic fail."
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April 24, 2008
If correcting IM grammar and spelling is an "epic fail" then I guess we're both epic failures. My text messages on my cell phone are all complete sentences with punctuation and capitalization.
I have even had people recognize me while chatting under a different screen name because I was using complete sentences, punctuation, decent grammar, and correctly spelled words.
Why couldn't I have been a math geek?
ابن البط عوام
April 24, 2008
I thought your AIM conversations would just involve Jack Bauer and Frodo Baggins references. I was so wrong.
April 25, 2008
Technically, in order for that to be Epic Fail, using proper grammar would have to be a dumb thing. However, your constancy in keeping your AIM buddies in line may be the straw that breaks bad-grammar-camels back.
My favorite thing to do when someone IM's me something like, "hay wat up wat r u doin" is to reply, "Hey. I'm doing alright. How are you doing?" Can't you just hear the utter disdain in all that punctuation?
Justin: Yes, but it would be Jack Bauer and Frodo Baggins references with proper grammar.
April 25, 2008
Oh man, I totally do that too. My friend Joel, just the other day, typed out, "hahahahaha" on Gchat, and when I asked him what was so funny, he replied that he had just realized that I use a period at the end of every sentence. Why using correct punctuation is so hilarious, I'm not sure...
And at least you're a bitch in some ways... there's hope for you yet to be the bad-ass you always wanted to be.
April 25, 2008
I fancy your alliteration: feminine fonts
April 25, 2008
Wow, that sounds like my nightmare job... I would totally snap and do something wacky... Tea parties?!
April 26, 2008
I believe that I pissed myself while reading this entry. Freakin' hilarious.
April 29, 2008
No, no! No epic fail. The world needs more "bitches" cleaning up the miserable chat-ness that is AIM. Could you work on "Barrens chat" while you're at it?? LOL!
April 29, 2008
hahaha i LOVE using epic fail and epic win in everyday situations. typically it baffles people so it's refreshing to read another "22, pirate, college student, not drunk" woman using it too. :)
April 30, 2008
Man I think I would die organising tea parties all day. At least you have the alter ego life happening. Maybe you are a superhero and you have the power of spell check?