Tip for Google Users

• 

If you're going to search for something creepy or pervy like "photos of ladies in panties" or "dead children" or "photos boys in heels and skirts," copy the link location of the search result into a fresh tab or window to avoid tipping off people like me that you landed on my site that way. (GOOD HEAVENS, INTERNET. GET A LIFE. And a girlfriend.)

Bonus tip: I do not have any affiliation with Bill Watterson (other than being a huge fan of Calvin and Hobbes), nor can I arrange for you or your son to meet him.