Even my plants drink filtered water.


Shortly after the boys returned to school from Christmas break, we organized a trip to Wal*mart to stock up on supplies for the semester. I had bought dozens and dozens of water bottles a month when Aubrey and I were roommates in the fall, but my budget wouldn't allow for such extravagance any longer. Instead, I opted to buy a Brita pitcher and was delighted to find one for the low, low, student-friendly price of five dollars. Five dollars!

I double-checked the price three different times, comparing the UPC on the box of the product to the UPC listed with the price on the shelf. It was true! For five dollars, I could have lovely drinking water for at least two months. Granted, replacement filters are made of platinum and cost five arms and three legs, but I'm hoping to just find another five-dollar pitcher later.

All this to say, I feel this man's pain...

Water connoisseur: So, how did things go last night with... Ugh... What's her name? Kate?
Friend: Seriously, dude, it was going so well, but then she did something really f-ing nasty.
Water connoisseur: Whaaa?
Friend: Dude, she put an unfiltered ice cube in my Brita water. She totally tainted the water. Dude, that's just gross.
Water connoisseur: How do you know she didn't filter the cubes?
Friend: Dude, you just can't risk something like that...